


Can't Let Go

by anemptymargin



Category: Actor RPF, British Actor RPF
Genre: Fluffy Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-24
Updated: 2007-10-24
Packaged: 2017-10-11 02:50:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/107536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anemptymargin/pseuds/anemptymargin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Simon just can't let Nick go, but does he really have to?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can't Let Go

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first foray into the fandom, I apologize if it's not quite up to par. I just had to, they were too delicious too resist! A very special thanks to Zeddish for introducing me to the fandom, being my sounding board and taking a mallet to my grammar. It's all your fault, hon. Thank you.

It had been a good year; success, fame and more than enough scratch to keep a roof over his head, not to mention enough work to be nice and busy. More like it had been a great year, better than any he'd had in quite some time and as he slung himself down in the old battered sofa that had been in Nick's flat as long as he could remember, all Simon wanted to think about was how much had stayed the same.

Nick. Through it all he hadn't changed, hadn't lost so much as an ounce of everything that made him the one person he could never shake free of. Nick was his rock in the middle of everything, no matter how much everything around him was changing he could count on things to never change with Nick. Except well, maybe some things.

"What's wrong?" Nick lifted an eyebrow when Simon leaned heavily against him.

"Nothing." Simon lied, just a little bit. It wasn't wrong really... just a matter of reluctance to do what he supposed was the right thing. "I need a drink."

"Well, get a drink then." Nick chuckled, giving Simon a push with his shoulder. "Lazy bastard."

"You're a horrible wife." Simon grinned, then looked away quickly - pushing himself up off the sofa for the drink he didn't actually want but felt somewhat obligated to retrieve.

Nick swung his legs up onto the sofa, stretching out the entire length before arching his back to look upside down at Simon as he returned with a pair of bottles. "I suppose that's why you're gonna ask her, then." He flashed a wide smile. The grin slowly fading when Simon stopped dead in his tracks.

"What makes you think that?" Simon swallowed hard. He hadn't told Nick... he'd been putting it off in fact. It's just things were going so well he didn't know quite how it would go over.

"Well I'm not stupid." He licked his lips, lowering himself so that he couldn't see Simon anymore. "It's been a while and you seem to like her well enough."

He did like her, loved her even, but it was a tough decision in the light of everything that had happened. "I haven't yet." His voice was much more quiet than he intended and he realized how scared he must sound.

"You should." Nick rubbed his sock clad foot against the back of the sofa, looking up over the back for Simon - smiling slightly when he could see him again. "She loves you, you know."

Simon blushed slightly and felt it burning around his ears, it was true. "Yeah. I know." He sighed, sitting on the arm of the sofa and taking a long draw off the suddenly much more welcome beer.

A quiet silence passed between them, the moment drawing out to awkward proportions even for them. Finally Nick pulled his knees up and pushed himself back into a reclining position facing the arm. "Don't lose her, mate."

Simon nodded and moved over to the now vacant spot, passing over the untouched bottle and taking another quick sip of his own. "I don't want to upset things."

Nick sighed and shook his head, parting his knees and looking down over his belly. "Simon, look at me."

"What?" Simon grumbled into his bottle.

"Look at me."

Simon turned his head, opening his eyes wide. "What?"

"C'mere." Nick gestured with his hand, taking a quick drink off his beer before setting it aside.

"Stop it." Simon chuckled softly, not entirely sure where Nick was going but fairly sure it was part of some twisted joke.

"I mean it, get over here." He gestured again, this time pushing his glasses up his nose and giving Simon a mostly scathing look.

"Fine, what?" Simon sighed again, setting aside his now mostly empty bottle and pushing up on one knee - pressing close against his friend's calves.

"Closer." Nick smiled wider, reaching up and grabbing the edge of Simon's t-shirt sleeve and giving it a gentle tug.

Simon was not amused, he rolled his eyes and leaned in between Nick's knees slightly - letting his chest rest on Nick's rounded belly. "Yes, Nicky?"

"Almost there." Nick licked over his lower lip, then hooked both hands under Simon's arms and pulled him up face to face. "That's better."

"Is it, now?" Simon shook his head, resigning himself to the fact that if Nick desired to be laid on he'd best get comfortable at least.

"Yes." Nick let out a soft chuckle as Simon struggled a little, finally letting himself relax. "Now. This can go one of two ways." He stroked his hand firmly down Simon's back, letting it slip into the loose waist of his trousers. "We can be happy or we can be miserable."

"I guess." Simon nodded against Nick's shoulder.

Nick smiled wider and brushed his cheek against Simon's slightly - rather enjoying the sensation of the roughness against his recent shave. "Awright... and what makes you happy?"

Simon felt himself smiling as he buried his face in Nick's shirt - inhaling the rich scent of sweat and smoke. It was everything familiar at that moment - the best friend he didn't want to leave behind. Fuck progress. "You do." He mumbled.

"Right, but what else?" Nick gave a hard stroke back up to Simon's shoulders, wrapping his other arm around to hold him tighter - not sure if it was more for Simon's comfort or his own. Their friendship had gotten odd like that... most times it seemed hard to remember where Simon ended and he began.

Simon closed his eyes tighter, letting his body weight sink down against Nick - he'd taken it a hundred times before it was nothing new. "Work I guess." He mumbled, "And video games. And music. And lots of things."

"And Maureen?"

"Well, yes. Her too." Simon sighed, feeling the guilt settle in again. He didn't want to face it, didn't really even want to think about it at all.

"Good." Nick cut in before Simon could voice his guilt or worry. "That makes me happy."

Simon was still a moment, thinking about what Nick was getting at. It wasn't like him to be so serious... but it was a serious subject he supposed. "We won't be able to do this anymore." He whispered.

"Do what?" Nick smiled, once more letting his cheek gently rub against Simon's before placing a small kiss against his ear.

"You know what." Simon muttered, letting out another soft sigh.

"Don't see why not." Nick whispered, "Just a couple of mates cuddling is all."

"And the other things." Simon felt himself warm around his cheeks and throat again and chuckled into Nick's shoulder. "Best mates don't really those sorts of things you know."

"It's awright though." Nick smiled, placing another soft kiss. "Not hurting anyone."

"Mmm. I suppose not." Simon murmured, pressing his hip just the slightest bit closer against Nick. It felt good to be so close to someone - he couldn't even be so close with the woman he loved... despite their passion, it was just different with Nick. It had come from something so vastly non-romantic and just turned into... well, whatever it was.

"She already knows, you know." Nick murmured, once more stroking down Simon's back - this time letting both hands settle just under the thick waistband and trace along the top of his briefs. Maureen hadn't had to tell him anything, it was obvious she knew what was going on... probably not exactly what it was but well enough.

Simon inhaled sharply at the thought, a slight panic rising in his throat. He hadn't even entertained the notion that she might already know what he hadn't had the gall to tell her. "You told her?" He pulled away slightly, forcing Nick's hands farther up his back as his palms dug into Nick's shoulders.

"No." Nick shook his head, drawing his face up in mock surprise. "She's not stupid, Simon. If it bothered her she would have let you know by now."

"Christ." Simon shook his head, pulling away until Nick's arms drew him back down again.

"Calm down."

"I can't do this, Nicky." Simon shook his head against Nick's shoulder, turning his face just enough to stare at the curve of his jaw.

"Why not?" Nick turned to face his friend, "It's nothing we haven't been through before."

Simon sighed and wanted to look away but knew it would only make things seem even worse. "I love her."

"I know."

"You understand?" Simon closed his eyes, wishing it weren't all so oddly difficult.

"Yeah." Nick smiled to himself, he had understood well before Simon started turning it into an ordeal. "So, no more shagging?" He chuckled softly.

Simon felt himself warming again and opened his eyes, a laugh rising in his chest. "Well... I don't mean..." He turned his head away, letting out the laugh as he felt the blush creep up around his ears. "Lets not get too hasty." He grinned, biting into his lower lip.

Nick smirked, raising an eyebrow. "Ohh... I see. Now the dirty little pervert comes out..."

"Dirty pervert." Simon grinned wider, letting out a soft chuckle and pushing himself up by once more pinning Nick's shoulders. "You've some right to call me perv."

"There's my boy." Nick let out a louder laugh, sliding his hands up under Simon's shirt - easily peeling it up over his shoulders. "Now tell me how naughty I've been."

"You bastard," Simon laughed harder, the blush spreading all the way up his face as he leaned forward - face to face with his lover. "I hate you."

"I hate you too." Nick tilted his chin upwards, letting out a soft murmur against Simon's lips.

"Mmm." Simon pulled away from the gentle kiss with a wide smile, shaking his head. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Take off your trousers." Nick lifted both eyebrows quickly, sliding his glasses slightly off kilter.

"Help me." Simon leaned heavily against Nick, wriggling out of the loose denim and bending his knees - lifting his hips uncomfortably as Nick finally managed to tug them off by the cuff. "There," he panted just the slightest bit, resting against Nick's chest and letting his bare skin enjoy the sensation of the other man's clothes.

Nick grimaced as Simon collapsed harder against him, quickly getting used to the man's weight. "Much better." He grinned, running his hands over the curve of Simon's back.

"You're overdressed." Simon looked up with an almost sleepy smirk. He pushed himself back against Nick's thighs and tugged at the other man's shirt, quite pleased with himself as Nick stripped it off.

"Closer..." Nick wrapped his arms around Simon, locking them under his ass and pulling forward until he was able to easily unfasten his own trousers.

"Easy there..." Simon laughed softly again, steadying himself by planting one foot between the back of the couch and a cushion underneath Nick while the other extended down to the floor. "Shouldn't we go..."

"Uh uh..." Nick lifted his hips, pushing the trousers down as far as he could before simply kicking them towards the end of the sofa.

Simon nodded to himself more than anything, taking in a deep breath as Nick's warm hands tugged down his briefs from behind - exposing his partially erect cock.

"Much better." Nick pulled Simon just the slightest bit closer, leaning upwards to place a small kiss against the tip. "Mmm... it has been a while..."

"Nicky..." Simon sighed softly, feeling himself warm to the gentle touch as Nick's lips parted - his tongue running between them and turning what might have possibly been another word into a soft moan.

Nick smiled against the familiar flesh, feeling Simon harden even more as he reached up to run one hand over the shaft - drawing back the foreskin before taking the length fully into his mouth.

Simon let out another soft moan, striking out against the back of the sofa with one hand as the other stroked over the temple piece of Nick's glasses - brushing barely through his hair. "Christ..." He let his eyes close against the sensation, his outstretched knee shaking slightly as Nick rolled his tongue.

Nick grinned again, looking up only a brief moment as he felt Simon's fingers slide behind his head - tugging gently at his short hair. Even more eager, he grasped Simon's ass with both hands - giving a rough squeeze.

Simon gasped at the unexpected sensation, chuckling slightly. "Mmm... evil bastard..." He grasped harder at the back of Nick's head, pushing himself forward until he felt the frame of his glasses pressed against him. "Try that..." He managed another weak chuckle but bit down into his lower lip when Nick responded with a much too gentle swallow, eliciting a much louder moan. "Gah..."

After another gentle swallow, Nick slowly drew backward, letting his tongue slide up the underside of Simon's shaft - teasing at the hardness as he panted for a breath. "Mmm... you're blushing..."

Simon let out a whining gasp when the cooler air hit the wet skin, his outstretched knee beginning to buckle slightly. "Uh huh." He leaned in, pushing Nick's shoulders back against the arm of the sofa and kissing him much harder than before. "Mmmm..." He moaned against Nick's lips, pushing his briefs down his leg to the floor before bringing his knee back up until he was straddling Nick's hips.

"Mmm... Simon..." Nick breathed heavily, a small shudder passing through him as Simon wriggled against him - his own arousal almost comically tenting his undershorts.

"Mmmm?" Simon broke the kiss tentatively, still keeping his lips parted against the corner of Nick's mouth.

"I..." Nick sighed slightly, "I think the stuff's in the bedroom..."

"Stuff?" Simon raised an eyebrow, pausing a moment before it hit him. "Oh... stuff... right... wait..." He pushed himself back up, leaning back and realizing his trousers were on the floor. "My wallet... trousers..." He gestured towards the floor.

Nick nodded, pulling Simon back down when he attempted to get up to retrieve the item. "Got it..." He stretched out his leg, lowering it down and scooping up the pants between his toes - tossing them up onto Simon's back. "Ha!"

"A man of many talents..." Simon muttered, fishing the wallet out of his pocket before pushing them back to floor. "Right. Thought so." He smiled, finding a rubber he'd tucked in his wallet at some point... apparently anticipating such an emergency. "Lubricated even."

"Right." Nick grinned wide, once more ushering Simon back up onto his chest before taking away the foil packet and fumbling it open. "You told me you were on the pill..." He joked, managing to push down his undershorts and give his cock a few hard strokes before rolling the rubber down.

"Shut up." Simon let a chuckle slip, rocking his hips against Nick's belly and rather enjoying the sensation against his hard-on.

"As you wish." Nick licked his lips, leaning back against his elbows and opening his thighs. "Come on now, take a sit."

"You've got to be kidding me..." Simon lowered himself onto Nick's thighs. "There's no way..."

"Come on... trust me." He rested his hands on Simon's hips, helping him kneel astride. "Not like we've never done this..."

"Like this..." Simon shook his head and just let Nick roll with it.

Nick let one foot drop down flat on the floor while the other bent as though crossed on the cushion. "Right..." He smiled, pushing Simon's hips downward until he felt the tip of his cock brush against the cleft of his ass. "Gently..."

Simon watched Nick's face, feeling his body blushing pink again as Nick parted his cheek, tracing a thick finger from his tail bone down. It wasn't like it was their first time... not even their first time in a long time. It always made him blush to know that Nick was about to become more or less part of him - if only temporarily. "Okay..." He slowed his breathing, preparing for the sensation as Nick's index finger pressed so very gently against his opening.

"Shhh..." Nick felt his pulse begin to pound even faster with arousal and anticipation but he knew well enough from his own experiences the only way to do things was slow - or badly. "Good..." It was more a question than a statement as he replaced the finger with the head of his cock - gently rubbing the tip of the slippery rubber against the puckered flesh.

"Uh huh." Simon smiled, growing more comfortable with his knees on either side of Nick's hips as his foot moved back from the floor to safely crossed underneath him for support. He grasped Nick's shoulder with one hand while the other once more steadied him against the sofa. "Yeah."

Nick took a deep breath and held it as he pushed his hips up - letting it out as a slow moan as he felt his cock nudge inside his partner. "Down..."

Simon nodded slowly, biting into his lower lip as he pushed himself down further onto Nick's familiar length - thoroughly enjoying the sensation of being spread open so slowly. He made it down to Nick's thighs and let out a soft groan. "That... s'all."

"Uh huh. 'Sokay." Nick grasped Simon's hips and pulled his torso up slightly, then pulled Simon close against him. "Like this." He rocked backwards - letting out a breathy moan as his cock slid almost entirely out - then forwards again.

"Oh god..." Simon groaned into Nick's shoulder at the new sensation - the rocking thrust coupling with the unexpectedly amazing feel of his cock rubbing against Nick's round belly.

"Good?" Nick sighed heavily, beginning to rock in a deliciously slow pace.

"Mmmhmm," Simon whimpered softly, wrapping his arms around Nick's shoulders and holding him tight as each thrust seemed a whole new sensation.

Nick groaned against Simon's ear, his rocking getting just a little quicker with each thrust as he felt himself getting closer to the edge. "Fuck... Simon..." He whispered, swallowing hard and forcing back a low moan.

"Yes..." Simon panted, pressing his face against Nick's neck and kissing at the warm skin - feeling his body begin to tremble and muscles tighten. "Nicky..." He moaned loudly as Nick's belly continued to rub against him vigorously.

His thrusts came even quicker with Simon's moans urging him on and Nick smiled broadly, feeling Simon butting his cock even harder against him. "Like that?" He managed, suddenly bucking himself forwards harder - driving Simon down against his thighs.

"Fuck!" Simon shouted, grinding his face into the crook of Nick's neck - feeling like his whole body was vibrating. Nick's thrusts began to come even faster then - driving hard into him and rubbing his cock against the smooth skin.

Nick gasped, then moaned softly against Simon's ear as he felt Simon clutch harder around his shoulders - warm wetness spreading across his belly as he continued to rock them in pace. "Yeah..." He whispered, letting out another soft moan imagining how high Simon must be.

Simon shuddered hard as he came, digging his fingers into Nick's back. It wasn't what he had expected - not by a long shot. His body continued to pulse as he held tight, Nick's pace gradually slowing.

"Mmm..." Nick held back the moan, biting into his lower lip as he slowed his thrusts, finally pushing Simon down onto his thighs as hard as he could - groaning against Simon's ear. "Yeah..." He inhaled sharply, his toes curling against each other as he ground himself against Simon, filling the condom.

Simon held tight to Nick for a long moment, letting out another panting breath as Nick withdrew fully. He remained still for a long moment, even clinging to Nick as he laid back on the sofa - panting for breath and obviously exhausted.

Nick shuddered again and and caught his breath, stripping off the condom and holding it away from everything as he gave Simon another soft kiss. "I suppose we should go clean up." He chuckled slightly.

"Right, right." Simon gave one more soft squeeze around Nick's shoulder before pushing himself up on his unsteady feet. "Gotta let go sometime." He let out a dry chuckle, not sure why the statement didn't really feel funny at all.

"Yeah." Nick licked his lips and sat up, leading the way towards the shower. "Guess you do."

(End)

**Author's Note:**

> This is a work of fictional parody in no way intended to infringe upon the rights of any individual or corporate entity. Any and all characters or celebrity personae belong to their rightful owners. Absolutely no money has or will be gained from this work.


End file.
